I am thinking that I might not be a good Christian after all because I don't end my letters and emails with things like "In His Mercy," "In His Service," "Gripped by Grace," or "Clasped Firmly In The Hands Of God." I just usually put "Thanks," or "Regards" and leave it at that.
If I were a good Christian, I would undoubtedly have gone on 10 mission trips to build schools in Africa or dig wells in a remote shanty town in India. I would also make sure to tell everyone else in the church who couldn't afford to go about my "life changing" adventure just to spread the good word.
If I were good, I would have drunk directly out of the same communion cup as a leper and not worried about cooties or disease.
I would have wiped the sweat off a beggar's brow with my own shirt and then worn it all day-sweat side in.
I would always preface the important messages that God "gave" me for others with things like, "I am only saying this because I love you," and "God loves the sinner, but hates the sin."
I would always end my plans for vacation with the phrase, "Lord Willing" and hope that I hadn't dared to presume to take a vacay that might directly tick off Jehovah and ruin His cosmic plan for my life.
I would have large fish symbol or "If you think it's hot here….." bumper stickers displayed humbly on the back of my car and maybe throw in a nattily airbrushed "Jesus" vanity plate in the back window to really get the point across.
I would not be irritated by the well-dressed panhandler who always spots me in Grand Central. You know- the one who always "leaves" his wallet at home and needs a ticket to Armonk.
I would wear the WWJD charm bracelets I get from parishioners as Christmas gifts with pride instead of giving them to my six year old for her dress up box.
I would ask the little children to come unto me, especially the ones who scream for 2 hours on a 3 hour flight or publically eat scabs and or boogers.
Disclaimer: I planned to end this with a heartfelt summary about being a Christ follower, but I can't now because I have cracked myself up. And I don't suppose that this is a blog you read for spiritual insight-so you shouldn't too disappointed. Laters.
(If you have a bumper sticker or a mission trip under your belt, no offense intended)
Funny. I espeically like "directly tick off Jehovah" although obviously you write lines like that at your own risk :) Interesting though most of these things are things you would do if you were trying to live up to our perception of what a "good" Christian does rather than (perhaps) what a good Christian actually is and does as a result of what they are.
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